The Ultimate Guide To Helping Children Through A Calm And Balanced Nervous System

If you have children, you know the joy and purpose that children bring into your life and family.  Their smiles, laughter, hugs, and unwavering trust cannot be traded for anything in the world.

You also know the frustration that children can cause.  Their stubbornness, epic meltdowns, and outbreaks cause stress, loss of sleep, and the “I just want to pull out my hair” feeling.

So what if we could lessen the negative experiences and increase the positive ones?

Help your child have more “good” days than “bad” days?

No parent would mind that, would they?

Dr. Tony has spent over 7 years working with children who struggle with anxiety, behavior struggles, and low confidence and self-esteem.  He provides hope and answers with parents through his work, and he loves the results: watching parents see their children happy and enjoying life again.  

Are you ready to learn how your child could have less anxiety and more confidence?

Let’s get started!

Table of contents:

1. The problem:  Frustrated children acting out

2. The stress:  Families stuck in a negative spiral

3. The science:  How are your child’s nervous system and actions connected?

4. The vision:  Our children acting like normal kids

5. The plan:  Creating balance and calm in the nervous system

6. The results:  How Ashley’s son was changed

The problem:  Frustrated children acting out

Have you ever come home from a long, stressful day at work and felt exhausted?  The kind of day that leaves you with no physical or emotional energy when you arrive at home.

You know how all you want is to be left alone, but when you arrive home your child wants to hug you, play with you, and spend time with you.  You want to love them, but your mind and body just cannot come up with the necessary energy, and you just want time by yourself.

As a parent, you understand those moments of exhaustion, don’t you?

Did you ever think that your child might have these feelings every day?

Children who regularly display negative tendencies often are responding to the way that they perceive their surroundings and circumstances.   These responses can be physical or emotional.

Even though they may have no reason to be worried or afraid, their brain and nervous system  might be telling them that there is danger around them. This creates a misinterpretation of the child’s perception, and they begin feeling the need to create their own personal protection.

For example, let’s say James, your young son, is going to a birthday party.  It is a friend from school, and all the children at the party are Jim’s friends.  Jim knows all the guests and most of their parents.

The party is going well.  There are food, games, music, and gifts; pretty much everything you expect at a birthday party.

However, you begin noticing something in Jim.

As more people come and the party gets louder, Jim displays signs of a meltdown.  He should be having fun, but instead, he begins to breathe heavier, become aggressive, and a frantic look comes onto his face.

What is causing this?

Jim’s nervous system is incorrectly viewing the party and social interaction as a possible source of danger.  As a result, he begins to act out in ways that don’t fit the occasion.

Displays of anger, frustration, and possibly aggression are typical for children whose nervous systems are not operating correctly.  

2. The stress:  Families stuck in a negative spiral

As parents, we all know the feeling of pride when our children do something incredible or honor us with their obedience.  We want everyone to know that the child belongs to us!

But the flipside is also true.  If our child is known to have negative behavior, it can quickly cause the parents to feel shame, anger, or fear.

And what kind of actions to these emotions cause in parents?

Parents with children who express unpredictable behaviors will feel that their child needs to be in a constant state of supervision.  

This approach begins the negative spiral; a place where many families find themselves.

What does this spiral usually look like?

It starts with the parents noticing their child struggling in confidence and negative reactions to normal situations.  They see that their child becomes stressed about normal activities.

As a result, the parents feel they either need to give up or increase their efforts to discipline their children.  While it is not their preference, the parents are unsure how else to combat the negative reactions they see in their child.

The parents hope that this new structure and routine will help the child feel more safe and secure.

The parent’s motives are good for these new routines, but how does the child see it?

The child amy end up viewing these new routines as the “walls closing in.”  This can result in more stress in the child and more negative reactions.

What is the result of this negative spiral?

The parents often have to rely on either discipline or bribery to make anything happen, and no one feels like the relationship between the parent and the child is healthy.  

Parents caught in this negative spiral will often feel that they are walking on eggshells, and they cautiously expect a “blow up” at any time with their child.

Everyone wants to escape this negative pattern, but sadly not many people know the key to interrupting this pattern.

3. The science:  How are your child’s nervous system and actions connected?

Everything we have discussed so far has been pretty negative.  After all, no one likes seeing their child act out or the negative spiral taking place in their family.

But before we discuss breaking the negative cycle, let’s briefly talk about the science behind these negative outbursts.

We know that the brain and nervous system are the control center of our mind and body.  They regulate our body and organs, dictate our actions, and most importantly, they determine our perception of our surroundings.

The brain is the organ that controls not only what we see, hear, feel, etc.; it also controls how we perceive these interactions.

Why is this so important?

Because it can become easy for the brain to misinterpret the signals that the senses send to it.  

If the brain is receiving incorrect information from the nervous system, it will react accordingly.  As a result, if the spinal cord or nervous system is not working correctly in delivering these messages, then the brain begins to see everything in a skewed way.

Let’s look at a quick example.

Remember Jim, your young son who became stressed at the birthday party?  What happens if a nice adult approaches Jim and wants to talk with him?

The adult kneels beside Jim and gently places his hand on Jim’s shoulder and gives Jim a friendly pat on the back.  But instead of Jim acknowledging this friendly exchange, he cringes and moves away.

What is causing this?

Many times we immediately assume that Jim’s parents are bad parents, or that Jim has never been taught respect.  

But what if Jim’s parents have done everything they can to address this behavior, and they are trapped in the negative cycle that we discussed earlier?

What if, instead of a discipline issue, Jim’s brain is incorrectly receiving and misinterpreting signals that it gets?

Instead of a friendly pat on the back, Jim’s brain may have interpreted this gesture as an act of aggression because it broke his safety zone.  Jim may view it as a threat instead of affection.

Jim’s parents may be the kindest and most caring parents on their block, but that doesn’t mean they have the solution for Jim’s behavior.

So what is the solution for these outbreaks?

Keep reading for the solution, as well as a story of how a family’s life was changed when they understood this.

4. The vision:  Our children acting like normal kids

Before we discuss the solution to the brain and nervous system, let’s think about what we expect to see in our children.

You know the behaviors and reactions they currently have are not healthy and cause stress, but have you thought about what you would like to see instead?

What do we want in our children?

The answers may vary from person-to-person, but here are four things that every parent wants for their child:

Confidence - We want our children to be able to go through life with confidence.  Instead of fear, shame, or timidity; we want them to be able to approach life with a positive attitude knowing that they can succeed.

Enjoy life - There is nothing that brings more joy to parents than watching their children enjoy life!  Watching them laugh, play, making friends, smiling, telling jokes, being imaginative, and then falling asleep exhausted at the end of the day - these are just a few of the rewards of parenting.

Engage - No parent wants to see their child being alone or neglecting to interact with others.  We want to see our children display healthy engagement with other humans, whether they are adults or children.

Be “normal kids” - We want our children to have stories to tell their grandkids years down the road.  Stories of their adventures, imagination, books they read, and everything else they did when they were kids.

Every parent wants to see their child showing some level of these four things.  So what if your child does not portray these characteristics?

What if your child displays the opposite?

What can we do to break free from this cycle?  Let’s find out...

5. The plan:  Creating proper perception, balance and calm in the nervous system

You already know that your body is a fine-tuned machine.  Every part needs to be doing its job correctly, and this is especially true for your brain and nervous system.

As we mentioned earlier, if the brain is misinterpreting the signals that are being sent to it, then it will respond with actions and emotions that do not make sense to an adult.

At Life Potential Chiropractic, we understand that there is a close connection between your child’s brain, their central nervous system, and proper movement and perception of the neuro-spinal system.

If a child’s brain and nervous system are stuck in a pattern of stress, it is very common that patterns of negative behaviors will follow.

However, when calming input is given through regular adjustments, the affected parts of the nervous system begin having proper perception, and the results can be amazing.

Literally life changing, actually.

Although it may sound simple, the key is knowing how chiropractic care affects your child, and particularly in creating the balance and calm that they need to escape the cycle of frustration and acting out.

6. The results:  How Ashley’s son was changed

So what does this plan look like in real life?

Here is Ashley’s story of transformation with her son, Tucker:

“Dr. Tony has literally been a Godsend!

I spent years trying to help my 7 year old sort his feelings and emotions and felt like I was just moving backwards. Numerous tests, several diagnosis's that had me scratching my head, and medication I didn't want my child on.

I felt like I had nothing to lose by contacting Life Potential Chiropractic, and boy how it has changed our lives!

My son would have major meltdowns that would last for hours and result in him banging his head against the wall and trying to harm himself.  Telling him ’no’ would send him into a downward spiral, and he was nasty to his siblings.

We met with Dr. Tony and came up with his care plan, and he explained everything to my husband and me.  And for the first time it all made sense! I could understand why things that seemed so microscopic to me were such a big deal to my son.

After a week of being adjusted I noticed my first O.M.G moment!  My older son was trying to antagonize Tucker, and whereas before Tucker would have blown a gasket, he looked at my older son and simply said ‘You are not bothering me!’ and walked away from the situation.

Now, when I tell him ‘no’ he says ‘ok,’ and he isn't constantly loud and obnoxious. He says when we pulled up to Dr. Tony’s office ‘I love coming here!’

He may not be totally aware what is happening inside his little mind, but he knows he feels so much better! I am so hopeful and excited for this little guy’s future, and I can't wait to see what the future holds for my little man.”

Conclusion:  You can transform your child’s life!

Our goal at Life Potential Chiropractic is to transform your child’s life by creating balance and calm in your child’s nervous system.  By working with you and your child, we will help your child view their surroundings correctly.

Instead of their senses seeing everything as a threat, her senses and brain begin seeing things as usual, and she responds in ordinary ways.

Instead of reacting negatively in a birthday party, Jim is able to play with the other children and have fun.

Instead of your family being stuck in a negative spiral, you can watch your child be confident, enjoy life, engage with others, and be a normal kid.

Let us help you transform your child and family!  Schedule a meeting with Life Potential today!


Life Potential Chiropractic

136 E Lancaster Ave

Downingtown, PA 19335

(610) 269-3743

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